Because after the Albany Academy swim meet, while I was basking in the bliss of a shower that actually spouts hot water-a luxury our backwoods public school lacks-I was bodily seized by my six evil teammates, and dragged outside, and deposited there in the December cold, naked, wet, spluttering, pounding on the door, screaming, imagining hypothermia, penile frostbite, until the door opened, and an utterly uninterested girl opened the door and let me in and said, “Jeez, calm down.”ĥ. Because I loved Anchal, with the fierceness and devotion that only a gay boy can feel for the girl who has his back, who takes the Cosmo sex quiz with him, who listens to his pointless yammerings about his latest crush, who puts herself between him and his bullies so often that the bullies’ wrath is ultimately re-routed onto her.Ĥ.
AM I GAY QUIZ LAGOON HOW TO
Because God, or the universe, or karma, or Charles Darwin, gave me a different strength, one that terrified me until I learned what it was, and how to control it, and how to use it as the instrument of my brutal and magnificent and long-postponed vengeance.ģ. Because it would take the patience of a saint or Dalai Lama to smilingly turn the other cheek to those six savage boys day after day, to emerge unembittered from each new round of psychological and physical assaults whereas I, Jared Shumsky, aged sixteen, have many things, like pimples and the bottom bunk bed in a trailer, and clothes that smell like cherry car air fresheners, but no particular strength or patience.Ģ. Being queer is both wonderful and scary it's a thrill a joy to be alive you feel so wrong yet so right.1.
I won't forget one time I had my first make out session with aa girl who I actually genuinely liked it was passionate and I never told any of my family members about it until tonight. and everytime I held a girl or one laid on me I felt warm inside it was nice to know they liked using me as a pillow or even liked touching me. Anyways feeling this way makes me realize I might be leaning more towards feminine people masculine and I'm ok with that because of all the experiences I've had with girls more then boys better experiences I wasn't once rapped by a women nor did they try too. My appearance is feminine but my gender in neutral I mostly use they them pronouns because I'd rather be called they them instead of she or her or him or he it's been that way for a bit now. made me feel worse lately and normally when I'm sad and depressed who's the ones that run up to me and see if I want to be with them or want to help? It's mostly the girls it's always been girls who have pulled me up and made me feel better, and it makes me think if I find my forever home with someone I want to marry I want that to be a girl I marry because I think I really do love girls more than guys. When I look at guys it use to be like that but so many guys have. When I see a girl I'm attached to my eyes just fixate on her and only her and I just stare and think man she looks soft, or she must smell great.
When I see a girl I am drawn too all I can think about is how much I want to cuddle her and feel her warm touch and just have fall asleep in my arms or me fall asleep in hers.
So I do like guys but I also very much like girls.